“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” ~ Oscar Wilde
This is one of the most relatable topic that I really want to create a post about since 2014. So, why since 2014? It’s because I have read the book ‘Backbone Power The Science of Saying No‘ which talks about having the integrity and backbone in making the right decisions for yourself to help you be more successful. It is about being your authentic self and learning to say NO without feeling guilty. Sometimes, we really find it hard to say ‘NO’ to the things that we don’t want to because we’re afraid that the person who’s asking for the favor will get mad. In other words, we live our lives thinking what other people say about us. Which is a big NO-NO. We should live our lives doing the things that makes us happy and not doing the things that causes us stress, anxiety, and even depression.
People-pleasing is a very relatable topic to me because unfortunately, one of the dearest people in my life has this behavior. People who have this behavior are called ‘People-pleasers’. They yearn for outside validation. They often feel like they have to say ‘yes’ when someone asks for their help. People pleasers are the nicest and most helpful people you may know. They (most of the times) never say “no.”
One of my family members have this. Whenever one of our relatives ask for help, he always find a way to help them. I know there’s nothing wrong with helping people but when people are abusing you, then that’s another story. You should set healthy boundaries. Know your self-worth and love yourself first. Don’t give all because even your shadow leaves you when you are in darkness. Setting healthy boundaries means that you love and you respect yourself.
Now, ask yourself, ‘Do people like you because you do things for them? Or because you’re YOU? Share your answers by leaving a comment below.
“Life is about balance. Be kind, but don’t let people abuse you. Trust, but don’t be deceived. Be content, but never stop improving yourself.” Zig Ziglar
© 2016 Joan Cabras. Permission needed for all forms of reproduction.
Photo Credit : Concord90